“Breaking” News

This just in to The Heap news desk:

Mark McGwire used steroids.

Let that sink in for a second. Or did you just chuckle to yourself, and just shake your head whispering, “It’s about time.”

Today, the former king of swing (dethroned only by another fellow ‘roider) finally came clean after the quite physical evidence of his choices were captured by cameras and seen by the nation for the past decade.

Come on, who of you out there were wholeheartedly surprised by this announcement? In fact, as a baseball fan, I am a bit offended by the timing of his announcement. Not even a week ago, McGwire might have even been voted into the Hall of Fame! Looks like it was one and done. What could have motivated him? Why now? I think he knew he could never shake the stigma of The Juice. He conveniently waited to see if he would make it this one time. He was a long shot, and one, he will forever remain.

Mark McGwire, as a normal sized Human Being

But then, is it plausible to say that the theatrics of the Steroids Era was engineered and puppeteered by Big Baseball itself? You’ve heard it all before all over the airwaves. Baseball, America’s Game was sagging behind the NFL in attendance and popularity. A strike towards the beginning of the decade only made the situation worse.

Enter the Home Run. The pinnacle of offensive explosion in any sport. A timeless play in a timeless game.  The individual’s effort in order to help the efforts of the team, but for those brief moments, the spotlight is on the batter as he rounds the bases. The home run personifies the American individual and the nation. (Check out my essay on Japanese/American baseball in the Original Works page)

Mark McGwire, as a chemically altered beast

In a decade of almost unfettered economic growth, of getting ahead at all costs, the 90s and the Steroid Era go together quite well. But in the end, it all falls down on itself. McGwire and Enron, A-Rod and Bernie Madoff, even Palmeiro and US Banks all had their heyday only to be exposed for what they were. Living the American dream.

Using performance enhancing drugs is cheating. Mark McGwire is a cheater. But don’t you worry, he and (I can’t believe I’m saying this) Sammy Sosa had quite the supporting cast- many of which are still TBD. The steroids era (we can only hope) is in its final act. They will have their curtain call soon.

Happy New Year! The Heap’s 2010 (Expected) Outlook

Happy New Year Heapsters! I know we are four days into the year, but I just wanted to formally express my best wishes to all family and friends who read along. It’s been a busy few days since the holiday, so  finally got the chance to post.

The Heap always rings in the new year with a bang, as the second annual unofficial Silver Forrest Fireworks Show (Sponsored by The Heap) may have been the best show yet in the 5 or so years of performances.

Supplies. Well Armed. The Heap knows how to blow it up.

Got some good deals at a local tent. The least I have ever spent and the most I have ever gotten. This made me quite happy.

Jephren with excellent photo taking skills. Mortar mid flight.

And here’s a pic of the action! Thanks to Jephren and his camera. So as you can see, it was a fun filled evening with lots of family, Spanish broadcasting, and beer. Hope all of you were able to enjoy time and be safe as well!

What does 2010 exactly mean for The Heap? Well, you won’t see too much of a dramatic change in philosophy. We will still present original viewpoints on, well, basically anything! There should be an exciting lineup of movies, DVD’s and music to review. We will be stepping up the critiques! There wasn’t enough of it and it keeps my skills up to par. On deck first (whenever I finally go and buy it) will be a review of Cage the Elephant’s new album. They’ve intrigued me enough to merit an album purchase, as I’ve heard a few songs during my lovely 8 hours at work!

Also, we are pledging to read more. You’d think that the English major in me would just want to continuously read and read and read, right? No, I feel that this has had the opposite effect, since I just wanted to get away from it for a while. This has turned to almost 2 years (Only having read a few things of note such as Watchmen and The Life of Pi). So! The Heap will have more book reviews as well!

One area I have not ventured into is video games. I’m progressing through Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 and Forza 3, so once I get far enough I will review those two as well. Hopefully I can get some other games this year!

I also felt that there was a noticeable lack of original content. I had a few good opinion pieces, but I need to write more. In addition, I need to enhance my creative writing as well. Look for perhaps some poems songs and short stories? Who knows! I know that I want to write some original essays about a few interesting thoughts I’ve had.

SO anyway! That’s where I hope to head with The Heap for the time being! Don’t forget to follow us on Twitter!

The Heap Presents: Review of the Motorola Droid Part 1- Overview and Apps

“In a World of Doesn’t, Droid Does,” was the Verizon Wireless advertising moniker for perhaps one of the most awaited smartphones since the revolutionary iPhone. In fact, little was known about the phone, only quick glimpses due to a seemingly secretive yet intriguing marketing ploy used by VZW. The brief TV spots had to have been influenced by the similar secretive approach used by the promoters of the film Cloverfield. Here’s a sample TV commercial clip:

And of course the infamous iDon’t commercial:

Nevertheless, the real question after all of the advertising hype and hoopla still remains: Can the Droid be the first successful “iPhone killer?” Or at the very least, begin the end for Apple’s reign at the top of the smartphone market.

One of the most glorified selling points of the iPhone is the simplicity of its OS. Everything is only a few slides of the finger and a press of the finger away. While I never did have an iPhone, I did have an iPod touch. The interface was extremely navigable immediately. There wasn’t much to learn when t came to general functions or where something may be hidden. Everything had an icon, and you just scrolled to where the icon was located. The most recent update to the iPhone OS even allowed you to group apps on different “pages” of the sliding menu.

Droid’s interface is generally simple, though a first time user does have to learn the functions of certain buttons as well as the extensive settings menu.  Also, the initial clutter that is all of the application icons is a bit daunting as well initially. But the burgeoning Android user will know how convenient it is to have icons to ALL installed apps listed alphabetically in a slide out menu. This allows the user two place all sorts of widgets and the icons of the most used apps on one of 3 main screens.

I have yet to become too “app” savvy, and am in need of tips for useful apps! I do use two widgets, The Weather Channel and CNN widgets. TWC widget is a quick and convenient way to immediately check weather and temperature, with forecasts only a click away. CNN seems to be a good news widget, bt to be honest, I don’t look at it too much. I have heard that USA today might be the way to go with regards to a news ticker. I might have to give it a shot.

Don’t forget the “Social” apps! Dont worry. Facebook for Android already comes pre-loaded. So you can check that one off of your list. If you are into Twitter, I recommend Twidroid Free edition. The app allows you to update Twitter, while receiving tweets for those you follow instantly. AIM and Myspace apps are also available.

Droid requires you to have a Gmail account. Thus, your account’s email is synced to the device! It is possible to sync more than one gmail account (like my personal one and the account for The Heap!) and email addresses from other domains. In addition to email, your user name serves as your GChat name as well! Your buddies can chat with you on your phone as well!

The main free sports app for the Android OS is SportsTap. The app itself is very good, as scores from sports around the world, as well as surprisingly detailed box scores/ stats are readily available. The widget was disappointing because it didn’t seem to work most of the time. The favorite teams customization is pretty useful, as you are alerted when your team is playing and of changes in score. (Another Overtime loss for the Lightning tonight, by the way)

Then, like iPhone, there are an endless amount of created apps for just about anything! Some fun ones are the Coin Flip and Magic 8 Ball apps, that use the phone’s accelerometer to roughly simulate the physics of an actual coin flip or the shaking of the 8 ball. Google Sky Map is by far one of my favorites, as it uses the phone’s position and orientation to accurately tell you what constellations celestial bodies are visible by the user! It is absolutely amazing! And lastly, I have some other practical apps, like Flixster movies for times/reviews, Kayak for travel plans and Phoneflicks for organizing my Netflix queue.

As we can see, this has gone for far too long! I’ve decided to cut the review into parts. Part 2 will be about Music Apps, music playback and other media/ entertainment apps/ capabilities! Part 3 will most likely be about functionality, messaging, what I like and don’t like, and what makes Droid a serious contender in the smart phone battle! I might even make my own review video, showing off my Droid and showing you heapsters how it works! Stay tuned!

Happy Holidays from The Heap!

Just wanted to wish all of my family, friends, and readers a Happy Holiday Season! Hope you enjoy the First Annual The Heap Cyber Christmas Card!

We’ll be back to regular writing this weekend. Be safe, and enjoy time with family! Preach Peace!

-The Heap Master

FTDO: A Message of Peace

The Heap presents a special edition of “From The Desk Of” since I really don’t have the chance to write from work anymore. It has gotten extremely busy these days, especially now that it is the end of the year! So I’ll tell the tale from the comfort of home!

I have stories upon stories to tell thanks to the vast array of interesting people my job allows me to help through the county’s patient assistance program. But this ONE story really touched me. I mean, it absolutely makes you appreciate the circumstances I was born into, how fate had it that I was born as an American during a relatively peaceful time, and how one of my patients was born into extreme poverty in what can be considered a third world country. He grew up during a time of political unrest and ultimately bloody revolution. He lives to tell of the atrocities he has experienced.

A lot of my older patients have a hard time understanding the general process of the program we run, and what exactly is needed. Now factor in that he can only speak and understand Spanish, and confusion reaches a whole new level. Both he and his wife are recent immigrants to the US mainland, so despite their age, they are not eligible for the mainstream government programs. Fortunately, they became citizens and are eligible for these other programs directly from the manufacturers of their medication.

Now let’s pause here and think about this. How bad must things be for someone to leave their country at an old age for a land where you don’t know the language and you have absolutely nothing. You are leaving poverty for poverty essentially, and I dare say that living in an impoverished state here in the US might even be worse than that of Cuba. Obviously, it’s not a question of quality of life. While poverty is not the ideal situation to find yourself in, the US has a rich history of community service and outreach programs. Americans are typically very generous.

The problem is that poverty and dependence on the government has such a negative stigma here (and in particular these days as fiscal policy is scrutinized seemingly every hour!). The situation MUST be dire to leave a place where EVERYONE is poor to a place where not only will you be poor, but you might even be looked down upon due to stereotypic generalization. (This is a rant for another day)

My patient takes a medication called Abilify. It helps with depression, but often causes “spaceyness” and forgetfulness. We’ve faced the same problem with the Abilify program for months. They require a state Medicaid denial letter in order to receive beyond the initial shipment of the medication. So of course, we have the task of calling to remind patients that this must be done in 90 days. Needless to say, there are a good number of patients who just don’t cooperate or don’t understand.

Our patient was one that didn’t understand. So he and his wife came to the office to see what could be done. His wife’s medications were simple enough, and we haven’t really had any problems with any of her applications. But for the patient, there were still some medications pending. To make a long story short, I offered to do the Medicaid application for him online.

So we went back to my office, and we just began to talk. My patient preaches a message of world peace. It’s on the top of his prayer list, as he told me. He grew up before and during the Cuba Revolution. He was deemed as a “government asset” and was assigned clerical tasks instead of being forced to be a laborer. Unfortunately, he lost favor with one of his commanding officers and he was forced to join the military, and was given the task of digging graves as well as digging up graves in search of precious metals. It was a period of extreme fear. He would come to work one day only to learn of the government executing a coworker.

He made it through, and somehow was allowed to immigrate into the US with his wife. He was able to bring his daughter and granddaughter over, and they are all able to get by together. They were lucky, and they know it.

This all happened maybe a month or so ago. What compelled me to write about this was that he called me today to with me a Merry Christmas! And again to stress the importance of peace among countries of the world. I was very touched by this.

How can we get to a state of peace here in this world where differences are grounds for war? Is it an attainable goal? It it plausible to even depend on God / religion as a cornerstone for developing peace among peoples? Especially with the issue of “God(s)” being the very issue that many go to war for?

Can society ever become “colorblind”? This is where John Lennon’s “Imagine” makes perfect sense. All possible categories of difference would theoretically have to be eliminated. Anyone have thoughts on this issue? Does religion have to be part of a solution, or would it further hinder the process? Why does the human race place figurative values on a human life according to category?

This Christmas, spread a message of Peace, Joy, and Love.

The Trashman Chronicles: Back in Time for the End of the Year!

My goodness. Has it really been almost 4 months since I’ve last written? I guess it really hasn’t hit me until recently how much I’ve missed writing for my (hopefully still) loyal readers and well, really, for myself. Alas, there is no Phoenix euphemism for what has occurred this time. (I already used my allotment of those on this blog the last time there was a lengthy break!)

I know that many rumors have been started about The Heapmaster’s whereabouts, especially with the blog’s last twitter update being “The Heap Master is really, really drunk.” No, I am not dead, lost at sea, or buried beneath pile and piles of trash. I was these things at some point in the last few months, but no longer.

One of the worst feelings in the world I believe is watching as the life gets sucked out of you, and knowing there really isn’t much you can do about it. Sure, part of it is your own fault, but for the most part, you’re at the hands of the will of the World’s governing force. It’s almost been 6 months since my last life update, so I guess it’s appropriate that it comes at the end of a rather tumultuous year.

I last left you in July with news of Wedding Bells, luxury sedans, Golden Domes, and relative happiness. I did make it up to PV’s wedding in July, and it was so wonderful to see everyone together getting absolutely obliterated on the dance floor. Heck we even made it to The Backer! The morning after wasn’t so glorious (apologies to the janitorial staff of Carroll Hall), but it was great to walk campus and see everything again. It made it all seem less like a dream.

In August, I started The Heap’s Recycling Project, as I dieted until the end of October. Since I didn’t update, my progress wasn’t logged. But, I lost 30 lbs! I made it down to 240! These days I’m hovering around 245. I was forced to stop the project thanks to the development of a “cevacious cyst” on my back! So after finally getting that removed, I was forced on a month or so respite from doing the trash! So obviously, with that went the hardcore exercise routine. I am back to it, and all efforts will be renewed come 2010 due to a friends bachelor party cruise in September. 3o more lbs and I would be set!

November was an awful, awful month. And to be honest with you, I couldn’t give you specific reasons. Sure, there was the infamous rear ending and ticket fiasco. Almost $200 later after ticket and driving school costs, now I await the jacking up of my insurance rates in June. Work was a little rough as well. And well things were just not going in the direction I wanted them to go. What ever was left of my relationship crumbled away. It will take a little bit of time to heal.

Things started turning around Thanksgiving break after the High School crew came in to town. So as you can imagine, nights of unfettered debauchery ensued. It was fun to see everyone again and meet new people as we went out.

So here we are, at the end of the year. This year, more than any other in recent memory, really flew by fast. A lot has changed in the latter half, and I’m ok with that. I just know that I am back, not only here to my writing duties, but to my commitments as a friend, brother, son, and employee. I feel my spirit returning, after months of seeming like I was a zombie going through the motions. God sends blessings at the most unexpected times. This year seems to be ending on a good note, and I am excited for what 2010 will bring.

-The Heap Master

Band of the Day

Music has become probably the only saving grace for me when it comes to making it through the day here at work. With all of the constant bombardments from patients and pharmaceutical companies, sometimes you need a little something to escape for a little bit… maybe something to get you into the groove and process all the paperwork you have to do rather quickly.

As I’ve posted previously, Pandora usually fulfills my musical needs. But, after receiving a desparate plea from Pandora’s founder to stop listening to so much damn music I’ve had to find other avenues. (I’ll post the actual email later this weekend).

Playlist.com lets you search for any song by any artist and lets you listen to it streaming. From here you can add it to your own playlist and share it with the rest of the playlist.com community. They’ve even added some social networking capabilities via meebo. So you can now talk to those who discover your playlist! It’s pretty neat.

Anyway, this brings me to The Band of The Day. Every once in a while, I get in a mood where I just want to hear every single song by one band to see how the “other songs on the albums” are.

Today’s band of the day is Paramore. I’m almost through the entire list, and let me tell you, It certainly doesn’t disappoint. I don’t think I skipped a song for not liking the sound or words! I might have to buy some albums on itunes. Though newer stuff hasn’t made it on this list yet. You can’t beat a hot rocker chick with an absolutely amazing voice and blond red hair singing to my heart’s content. I want a Hayley!

Check out what I’m listening to here!

FTDO: An Angry Doctor

There are daily trials and tribulations at any job. But, when you have to deal with other people, these daily challenges become a bit amplified. Today my coworker was dealing with a pharmaceutical company. She had ordered some insulin for the patient a few weeks ago and it had yet to arrive.

Upon calling to find out the status of shipment, the customer service rep gave her some lame explanation as to why the order was cancelled. And then! They requested that the doctor had to write a letter explaining why we were ordering the insulins at a separate time! Uh, because the patient was just put on the additional therapy maybe?

In any case, as the resident English major, I get to write letters. I enjoy this because for those brief minutes, I am Doctor So-and-So writing you to SHIP MY DAMN MEDICINE. So today, I was feeling rather sarcastic, and wrote up this mock draft of what I really wanted to say. (Of course the real letter is much more professional… but saying the same thing!)

To Whom It May Concern:

 This letter is in reference to product requests for my patient.

 You have got to be kidding me. I’m a fucking doctor and I need to write a letter explaining why the hell YOU guys can’t get your act together. Why do I have to sit here and write a letter explaining why I gave this patient another insulin? Because he fucking needs it! Or in medical terms, his fucking pancreas sucks ass and doesn’t produce enough insulin.

 So I’d appreciate if all of you at Novo would just back the fuck off and stop wasting my time making me write letters explaining decisions that are based off of a 250,000 education, not to mention the 10 plus years I have in the field.

 Anyway, I need to get back to actually saving peoples’ lives. Send that medication, or I will cut you.

 Please accept this letter as a valid explanation of the discrepancy, and ship the patient’s requested product upon receipt.

 

Thank you for your assistance in this matter.

 The Doctor

Gets the point across rather colorfully, don’t you think?

 

The Heap Presents: The Recycling Project

This might be the closest to a “green” movement you’ll ever see here on The Heap.

No, we aren’t talking about knowing which products go in the blue or white bin. Or even remembering to put the recycling bins out on a weekly basis. (Though The Heap does recommend and smile upon recycling- it’s less trash for him!) It’s much more personal than that. It’s time to get rid of The Heap’s heap of a mid-section.

Today, August 1st, is the official start date for my diet, though I actually started earlier this week… to kind of ease into it. Ive been doing well, no super strong cravings yet. In fact, I’ve been able to stave off temptations at work!

My diet of choice is the trusty Weight Watchers. WW was quite effective for me when I last was on it in summer of ‘06, so I’m hoping to see better results that I don’t have to go back to school and battle the lovely temptations of SDH.

So, you can count on a weekly report: The Recycling Project for a journal-like entry of how I am doing, a breakdown of my daily point consumption, and weight loss.

I’m shooting for the 230’s by Christmas time!

Starting at 270 as of today! (Which was actually a lot lower than I thought I was!) SO a loss of 40 lbs. in 5 months is certainly do-able! Especially with my vigorous exercise regimen known as The Trash, I do 5 times a week. I’m excited.

Wish me luck.

Buccaneers Introduce Throwback Jersey!

The infamous creamsicle orange is back in the Bay Area, as the Buccaneer’s finally succumbed to the throwback trend. And with the advent of HD technology, FOX might just have to warn in advance of possible vision damage and/or blindness as a result of the Orange returning.

Let’s not forget the return of Bucco Bruce, whose portrait adorns the helmet and completes the (obvious) 70’s gridiron ensemble. Legend has it that he wasn’t even a pirate at all, but just the leading man in a really bad 70’s porno. What were they thinking back then?

In all seriousness, I love the orange! It’s definitely unique… to say the least. But here in Buc Town, it’s also synonymous with losing, a lot. You can count the winning seasons in orange on one hand over the 20 year span of the Creamsicles. The Glazers, and more prominently, Jon Gruden had zero interest in digging up the sweetest atrocities in all of sports from the grave.

That is, until the expectations for this season went down the toilet bowl, along with the economy and season ticket holders. The Bucs are practically begging people to buy tickets. So of course, from a marketing and merchandising standpoint, this will serve as additional revenue. With an anticipated losing season on the horizon, any hype is welcome.

Antonio Bryant as wondering if anyone is scurred and confuz’d about the return to Orange.

The Heap applauds the jersey, but not the act of desperation by the Glazers (who just want to have some cash to buy more players for Man U anyway. Sigh.) Possible purchase in the future? To date the only throwbacks I’ve seen was Leeroy Selmon’s 63 and Mike Alstott’s 40. I’m not sure which player I’d buy if they were to sell them now.

So the Bucs have committed to using them at least once for the next 5 years! This year’s game will be November 8 against Green Bay.