An Email…

It’s good to be back. It was an excellent weekend. Good weather. Good people. Good fun. But now it’s back to the grind. Back to work and back to my duties.

I received my first email at our email address here while I was gone! I was excited at first, but then… I realized that someone had made good on my request to hit me up with any offers to help people invest millions of dollars.

Here’s the original text:


Dear Friend,
I introduce myself as Mrs.Belisima Bati, a citizen of Philippines, I am a top official in charge of client accounts in (EQUITABLE PCI BANK) which is now BANCO DE ORO UNIVERSAL BANK inside the Philippines the merger was 2007. I have a Business proposition for you involving a huge sum of money (Ten Million, Two Hundred Thousand United States Dollars). I want to move the funds out of my Bank but will need your help.

Please reply me back at: E-mail: (

Mrs. Belisima Bati

Wow, Banco de Oro Universal Bank? No way? A Spanish bank in the Philippines! Well, it’s a real bank at least.

And they ask the help of The Heap in order to help get rid of funds? This could be our shot at international fame!

Or at least a good blog bit for a few entries. Why don’t we respond!

Mrs. Belisima Bati,

I have just received your email and I apologize for not responding sooner. I was out of the office for my own business transactions.

Upon reading your request and verifying the status and prestige of your financial institution, I would like to accept your offer and try to help you out.

I am honored that you would choose us here at The Heap, a modest but growing organization, to help you with your business transaction. Our readership has blossomed in the past year and we have recently updated our format to include email and twitter, only increasing reader accessibility.

We hope to expand and add additional staff, and it appears that you may provide us an opportunity as business partners to achieve this goal.

Please respond with instructions. I look forward to our partnership.

Respectfully Yours,

Heap Master

Obviously, this is a scam… but we can’t miss out on opportunities for fun! I’ll keep you updated!

And for the love of God, send me some real mail!

smallheap.jpg image by jmooser