FTDO: An Angry Doctor

There are daily trials and tribulations at any job. But, when you have to deal with other people, these daily challenges become a bit amplified. Today my coworker was dealing with a pharmaceutical company. She had ordered some insulin for the patient a few weeks ago and it had yet to arrive.

Upon calling to find out the status of shipment, the customer service rep gave her some lame explanation as to why the order was cancelled. And then! They requested that the doctor had to write a letter explaining why we were ordering the insulins at a separate time! Uh, because the patient was just put on the additional therapy maybe?

In any case, as the resident English major, I get to write letters. I enjoy this because for those brief minutes, I am Doctor So-and-So writing you to SHIP MY DAMN MEDICINE. So today, I was feeling rather sarcastic, and wrote up this mock draft of what I really wanted to say. (Of course the real letter is much more professional… but saying the same thing!)

To Whom It May Concern:

 This letter is in reference to product requests for my patient.

 You have got to be kidding me. I’m a fucking doctor and I need to write a letter explaining why the hell YOU guys can’t get your act together. Why do I have to sit here and write a letter explaining why I gave this patient another insulin? Because he fucking needs it! Or in medical terms, his fucking pancreas sucks ass and doesn’t produce enough insulin.

 So I’d appreciate if all of you at Novo would just back the fuck off and stop wasting my time making me write letters explaining decisions that are based off of a 250,000 education, not to mention the 10 plus years I have in the field.

 Anyway, I need to get back to actually saving peoples’ lives. Send that medication, or I will cut you.

 Please accept this letter as a valid explanation of the discrepancy, and ship the patient’s requested product upon receipt.


Thank you for your assistance in this matter.

 The Doctor

Gets the point across rather colorfully, don’t you think?

smallheap.jpg image by jmooser