So You’re Sayin’ There’s a Chance!

Sometime it’s this quote from the movie Dumb and Dumber that gives hope to the long shots, especially when it comes to a really, really attractive girl.

Rumor on the street is that Megan Fox broke off her engagement to some now insignificant dude (Brian Austin Green, whoever that is!). So I hear she’s single and ready to mingle.

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So you’re saying there’s- uh, no. There is no chance. But at least we can oogle.

Well, at least I have Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen to look forward to! I don’t think many of us have forgotten her signature scene in the first one, where she fixes up Shia’s broken down hoopty.

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Absurd. I remember seeing this downtown at Channelside. Let’s just say the reaction was a collective “Wow, OMG” from the guys in the theatre. I don’t think you can blame anyone there.

Actress Megan Fox attends the premiere of the motion picture thriller "Eagle Eye", at Grauman's Chinese Theatre in the Hollywood section of Los Angeles on September 16, 2008.   (UPI Photo/Jim Ruymen)

And just one more random pic. I don’t even know what to write. Uh, nice rocks? Oh and by the way, you’re hot. Though I don’t know if I’m diggin’ the forearm bracelets. But I’ll let it slide.

I leave you with this hilarious video I found on Youtube when I was searching for Megan Fox clips. Instead I found a very tabloidish update by a video blogger named Philip DeFranco. Hilarious stuff. He apparently makes a new video M-F by 5pm on the latest going on in the world. The piece on Megan Fox as well as the ball crusher are great.

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Comedy Loses a “King”

bernie mac

Bernie Mac, talented comedian, actor, and writer, died today as a result of complications with pneumonia. Not exactly the best news to wake up to as a B Mac fan. Like most of you, you may have responded to the news with a quite audible WHAAAAT??, similarly to when Heath Ledger was found dead. I wasn’t even aware that Bernie Mac was 50 years old! Condolences to family and friends of one of my, and well, America’s favorite comedians.

As an appropriate tribute, our first list here at the heap. shall be dedicated to America’s favorite uncle, soon to be father in law, and baseball slugger. Thus I present:

Most Memorable Appearences of Bernie Mac! (In no particular order)

Comedy Hour with the Obama Camp.

Perhaps the most recent memory on the minds of many of BM, he was doing a mini routine during an Obama fundraiser in which he “joked about menopause, sexual infidelity and promiscuity, and used occasional crude language.” The following day, the Obama camp cited the display as inappropriate and openly rebuked BM. I can guarantee you one thing- I am sureeeee it was funny. You know, I can probably guarantee another. Obama was laughing. But in this day and age, jokes aren’t allowed in the political arena, nor is laughing, smiling, or actually passing bills that are worthwhile. I think comedy would greatly aid in diplomacy. Imagine sending Ambassador Mac to talk to Ahmadinejad. Nuclear crisis averted.

Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle
In general, the Charlie’s Angels movies are horrendous. Minus Cameron Diaz of course :). But in all seriousness, Mac as Bosley delivers the only REAL comic relief of the movie, and perhaps makes it watchable (though I’ll never sit through it again).

Kings of Comedy
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No explanation needed. Look for clips on YouTube. You will laugh. A lot. Unless you are a politician running for president and have to make everyone happy. Steve Harvey, Cedric the Entertainer and DL Hughley are GREAT as well.

Mr. 3000
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In what other universe could a middle-aged comedian even fathom the idea that he may be future hall-of-famer after reaching the critical milestone of the 3,000th hit? Only in the realm of the silver screen can this occur, as BM stars as Stan Ross, an egotistical former baseball player for the Milwaukee Brewers (who can only try for 3rd place in the central, we’re assuming the CUBS are in first place!) who decides to come back and attempt to rightfully regain his celebrity status. An endearing story of what could have been, and what still can be when one abandons the ego’s quest for glory and puts others first.

The Bernie Mac Show
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Pick an episode, any episode, and guaranteed you will laugh at the numerous domestic issues which come up when an uncle with BM’s personality is trying to raise growing children, as well as manage his own life! Perhaps he will be most remembered for his pseudo-serious confessional sessions with his audience. America, go find some reruns to watch TODAY!

Guess Who
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A social inversion of the classic “Guess who’s Coming to Dinner,” We find BM acting as the overprotective and subconsciously prejudicing father of Ashton Kutcher’s object of affection. What follows are hilarious events of attempts to win a father’s affection, sabotage, and raw competitive spirit. I recommend a viewing.

Ocean’s 11, 12, 13
I must admit, I have only seen bits and pieces of the first two, and I know I’m missing out, since I enjoy movies of this genre. But I can assuredly say that BM is a staple member of the cast. Again, his character Frank Catton provides comic relief (even though from what I’ve seen, most of the characters can pull this off). I’ll make sure to watch them soon!

Transformers
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His screen time is at most 10 minutes in Transformers, but I have to admit, as soon as I saw him, I was laughing. This one actually is one of my most favorite Bernie Mac moments. BM has one of those infectious personalities which you just have to like. The part for the used car salesman was well casted, and BM acted perfectly. You just can’t have anyone else in the world come across as shady and “cheesy,” not to mention so obviously unsuccessful as Mac’s portrayal of the salesman.

There you have it. Some of Bernie Mac’s most memorable moments. He will be missed! RIP.

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